How Social Media Affects Us
If you read my last post, I talked about reflecting on our feelings. In this post, I wanted to talk about how social media can affect us. In this post I share the positives and negatives of social media so that you can reflect on your usage.
Yesterday was Halloween and people will probably be posting pictures or videos on their social media. You might feel sad when seeing these because you weren’t invited to the party they went to or it looks like they had more fun than you did. If this is true for you then it is important to respect your feelings and maybe stay off of social media, just for a little bit.
Don’t get me wrong, I love social media! In fact, it’s my job and one of my passions. But… it can also be very toxic, especially if we do not listen to the cues our guts are giving us.
Each of us need to know what makes us feel good on social media and what does the opposite. Sometimes these feelings aren’t as obvious, but like I said in the last post, if you dig a little deeper, you’ll be able to see how the specific post is making you feel. You need to have enough respect for yourself that you will get off social media when it is triggering you.
I also think that social media can be great for relaxing your mind, but other times it can be more stressful. We need to assess if we are enjoying the time we are spending on social media, or just scrolling mindlessly for no actual reason. Try to have a purpose for going on social media. Your purpose could be anything. It could be because you want to see if your friends have posted anything new, or just because you want to relax, but make sure you stick to your purpose. If you realize that you are not getting what you need from social media, then why are you on it? Is it enjoyable? Or is it a mindless activity that needs to be reevaluated? You need to be mindful! Know why you are on social media and if it is not serving your purpose then get off of it. If you find yourself mindlessly scrolling and you aren’t even enjoying it then turn your phone off and find something else to do.
We tend to also think of social media as the first resort when we are bored. If you thoughtfully reflect on your situation, you can determine if social media is what you want to be spending you time on, or if you would rather do something else. If you want to be on social media and it is curing your boredom, that’s great! On the other hand, if you are on social media and still bored, brainstorm some new activities. I even like to look on Pinterest for ideas. Some examples of what you could do instead are: baking, hanging out with your family or friends, going outside, working out, playing a board game, helping around the house, etc.
I think social media has transformed our society into thinking we need to be doing something at every moment in time. However, remember it’s OK to be bored and sometimes creativity can come from boredom!
On another note, sometimes we are following influencers or friends and we might find their posts to be triggering. Luckily Instagram made up a magical button called, “unfollow.” If you don’t like what a certain influencer is portraying, unfollow them. Sometimes it’s also healthiest to unfollow toxic friends. You don’t need to define your feelings to others, that toxic feeling is proof enough for why you are unfollowing them. That said, you should think carefully before unfollowing someone if you know that there will be repercussions. Ask yourself if the repercussions are worth the unfollow. I know this can be a big step, but if you have thought it through, I promise it is for the best. If this is too big of a step, then you can snooze someone’s Instagram story instead.
Similarly, if a group chat is annoying you or somehow not making you feel good, snooze the group chat or put your phone aside. I swear they will still be there when you come back.
Social media can also be very distracting when we need to get work done. If this is the case, try to put your phone in a different room while you are studying or getting work done. Then, when you finish or if you need a break you can go get your phone. Even if you are not actually on your phone, it can be very distracting sitting on your desk or even in the same room. If you eliminate the distraction by taking your phone away, you can get your work done so much faster and therefore have more time later to relax.
If you are trying to decrease your screen time you can add limits to different apps. I like to add loose limits on my social media platforms so I know that if I want to continue on social media I can, but I also will get a notification when my time is up. Even if I don’t stick to the time limits, they still make me more mindful. To do this, go to Settings on your phone and go to Screen Time and then App Limits. You can then add your amount of time to the limit. With this time limit in place, you can either follow it, ignore it for 15 minutes, or ignore it for the day.
The last anecdote I want to leave you guys with is to remember that the photos and videos you see on social media are examples of what people want you to see. They are not showing the stressed side or the not so happy side. They are showing a so-called “perfect” side. They have probably taken hours to decide on a carefully curated picture to post. Pictures can also be extremely deceiving. I know I have posted pictures where I look as happy as can be and it looks like I had the best night ever, but I wasn’t having fun at all.
The most important takeaway is that you must be disciplined with yourself and respect your own feelings. In the end, you will be so much happier!